Am I Afraid of Commitment? — Relationship Test

This test covers commitments, independence, identity, control, the future, plans, procrastination, avoidance, withdrawal, conflict, attachment, alternation, rumination, pleasure and readiness to change. What the test asks, for example Commitments If the idea of making a formal commitment (living together, getting married...) makes you anxious. If you can commit clearly to someone without feeling panic or an urge to flee. Independence If commitment gives you the sense that you are losing a part of yourself. If you can be in a relationship without feeling that you are losing your freedom. Identity If you feel more like yourself outside a relationship than inside one. If you can commit to a relationship without fearing you will disappear as an individual. Control If you need to know you can leave at any moment in order to feel comfortable in a relationship. If being committed in a relationship does not make you feel 'trapped'. The future If you find it hard to imagine staying with the same person for the rest of your life. If you can easily picture a long-term life with your current partner. Plans If you avoid conversations about the future of your relationship (living together, shared plans, marriage...). If important relationship milestones (living together, having children...) feel natural and desirable to you. Procrastination If you often put off important decisions that would deepen your commitment to the relationship. If you can let a relationship develop naturally without accelerating or slowing its course. Avoidance If you often find a reason not to take an additional step in your relationship. If you can stay in a relationship as it becomes important without trying to escape. Withdrawal If you notice that you emotionally distance yourself when your partner gets too close. If you are capable of loving someone and staying present, even when it is difficult. Conflict If you sometimes create conflicts to put distance in your relationship. If the stability of a relationship is not something you flee. Attachment If emotional intimacy attracts you and frightens you at the same time. If you can receive someone's love without wanting to detach from them. Alternation If your tendency to blow hot and cold sometimes confuses your partner. If your feelings for your partner are stable and clear, without major inner conflict. Rumination If you often find yourself over-analyzing your relationships to determine whether they are 'the right one'. If you experience your romantic relationships without much ambivalence — you generally know what you want. Pleasure If you feel better in the early stages of seduction than in phases of stability. If you have no difficulty feeling happy in a stable relationship. Readiness to change If your relationship with commitment has a real impact on your life right now. If you believe you are capable of growing in this area.