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Am I Afraid of Commitment? — Relationship Test
63 questions·10 min·5 dimensions and a separate readiness-to-change module·up to 14 clinical frameworks·5 report sections
Reviewed by Gildas Garrec, CBT practitioner
Good morning,
This test looks at the fear of commitment. It describes a tension through four aspects: the difficulty of picturing yourself in the long term, the ambivalence between wanting closeness and fearing what it settles into, the withdrawals when the relationship turns serious, and a need for freedom that competes with commitment. The report describes each of these aspects.
What you receive — a report written from your answers: what stands out, what sustains it, and where to start. This week, this month, later on.
How it is built — each axis is analyzed on its own, then cross-read with the others, through clinical reading frameworks. Your detailed answers are attached as an appendix. See an example report
The test runs over 63 questions and takes about 10 min, for a price of $3.60.
We'd also suggest reading the book Avoidant Attachment, to take this reflection further. It's included in the price and downloadable.
If you have a question about your report, write to us at contact@psychologieetserenite.com: a psychotherapist will reply within 48 hours.
I'd also suggest analysing your conversation with ScanMyLove; it's a complementary tool that, from your exchanges as partners, sheds light on your relationship dynamics.
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Am I Afraid of Commitment? — Relationship Test — a 63-question self-assessment, about 10 min. This test looks at the fear of commitment: picturing the long term, ambivalence, withdrawing when the relationship turns serious, the need for freedom. Once finished, you receive a detailed PDF report ($3.60): an interpretation of its 5 dimensions, a radar chart, up to 14 clinical reading frameworks and a personalized action plan. It is designed to help you know yourself better.
This test covers commitments, independence, identity, control, the future, plans, procrastination, avoidance, withdrawal, conflict, attachment, alternation, rumination, pleasure and readiness to change. What the test asks, for example Commitments If the idea of making a formal commitment (living together, getting married...) makes you anxious. If you can commit clearly to someone without feeling panic or an urge to flee. Independence If commitment gives you the sense that you are losing a part of yourself. If you can be in a relationship without feeling that you are losing your freedom. Identity If you feel more like yourself outside a relationship than inside one. If you can commit to a relationship without fearing you will disappear as an individual. Control If you need to know you can leave at any moment in order to feel comfortable in a relationship. If being committed in a relationship does not make you feel 'trapped'. The future If you find it hard to imagine staying with the same person for the rest of your life. If you can easily picture a long-term life with your current partner. Plans If you avoid conversations about the future of your relationship (living together, shared plans, marriage...). If important relationship milestones (living together, having children...) feel natural and desirable to you. Procrastination If you often put off important decisions that would deepen your commitment to the relationship. If you can let a relationship develop naturally without accelerating or slowing its course. Avoidance If you often find a reason not to take an additional step in your relationship. If you can stay in a relationship as it becomes important without trying to escape. Withdrawal If you notice that you emotionally distance yourself when your partner gets too close. If you are capable of loving someone and staying present, even when it is difficult. Conflict If you sometimes create conflicts to put distance in your relationship. If the stability of a relationship is not something you flee. Attachment If emotional intimacy attracts you and frightens you at the same time. If you can receive someone's love without wanting to detach from them. Alternation If your tendency to blow hot and cold sometimes confuses your partner. If your feelings for your partner are stable and clear, without major inner conflict. Rumination If you often find yourself over-analyzing your relationships to determine whether they are 'the right one'. If you experience your romantic relationships without much ambivalence — you generally know what you want. Pleasure If you feel better in the early stages of seduction than in phases of stability. If you have no difficulty feeling happy in a stable relationship. Readiness to change If what you have just described has a real impact on your life. If you want to change the way you function.
About this test
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Dimensions assessed
- ●Your reading of your fear of commitment- The way you explain your fear of commitment, before the test tells you anything. This section does not measure any difficulty and does not produce a level: it collects a starting reading.
- ●Avoidance of projection- Do you find it hard to picture a lasting relationship? Avoidance of projection can take the form of steering away from conversations about the future, refusing important relationship milestones, or an inability to imagine a shared life.
- ●Ambivalence between desire and fear- Do you want a close relationship while also being afraid to commit to it? Ambivalence is a painful experience that can make any stable decision difficult.
- ●Avoidance when things get serious- Do you tend to withdraw or sabotage the relationship when it becomes serious? Avoidance can be conscious or unconscious — steering clear of important conversations, sudden emotional distance, pre-emptive breakups.
- ●Need for freedom- Does feeling 'trapped' in a relationship weigh on you? The need for freedom can be legitimate or excessive — this dimension explores to what extent it conflicts with your ability to commit.
- ●Readiness to Change- Measures your current readiness to acknowledge what you are experiencing and to evolve your relationship with commitment.
Reference frameworks and authors
- Fear of Intimacy Scale (FIS) — adapted (Descutner & Thelen, 1991)
This test is based on the Fear of Intimacy Scale (FIS) by Descutner & Thelen (1991), a validated questionnaire measuring fear of intimacy in romantic relationships. It is not a faithful reproduction: certain dimensions have been adapted and broadened to cover aspects of commitment beyond emotional intimacy alone.
This test explores your subjective relationship with romantic commitment. Scores reflect your perceptions at the moment you respond. Being afraid to commit is not a disorder — it is often a response to a specific relational history.
Why take this test?
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This test looks at the fear of commitment. It describes a tension through four aspects: the difficulty of picturing yourself in the long term, the ambivalence between wanting closeness and fearing what it settles into, the withdrawals when the relationship turns serious, and a need for freedom that competes with commitment. The report describes each of these aspects.
The questionnaire explores 5 areas: Your reading of your fear of commitment, Avoidance of projection, Ambivalence between desire and fear, Avoidance when things get serious, Need for freedom. Your answers support reflection, not a diagnosis. A separate module explores readiness to change; it is not another trait of the model presented.
Dimensions explored
These are the aspects explored by this questionnaire. Your answers help put them into perspective.
Your reading of your fear of commitment
The way you explain your fear of commitment, before the test tells you anything. This section does not measure any difficulty and does not produce a level: it collects a starting reading.
Avoidance of projection
Do you find it hard to picture a lasting relationship? Avoidance of projection can take the form of steering away from conversations about the future, refusing important relationship milestones, or an inability to imagine a shared life.
Ambivalence between desire and fear
Do you want a close relationship while also being afraid to commit to it? Ambivalence is a painful experience that can make any stable decision difficult.
Avoidance when things get serious
Do you tend to withdraw or sabotage the relationship when it becomes serious? Avoidance can be conscious or unconscious — steering clear of important conversations, sudden emotional distance, pre-emptive breakups.
Need for freedom
Does feeling 'trapped' in a relationship weigh on you? The need for freedom can be legitimate or excessive — this dimension explores to what extent it conflicts with your ability to commit.
Readiness to Change
Measures your current readiness to acknowledge what you are experiencing and to evolve your relationship with commitment.
How does it work?
1
Take the test
Answer the 63 questions honestly. There are no right or wrong answers — just choose the option that best describes you. The test takes about 10 min.
2
Proceed to payment
Once you finish the test, pay $3.60 securely to unlock your full report. No registration required.
3
Download your detailed PDF report
For a comprehensive analysis, get your PDF report (5 dimensions analyzed, radar chart, personalized recommendations, action plan). Instant download after secure payment.
Frequently Asked Questions
What does this test measure?
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This test evaluates 5 psychological dimensions: Your reading of your fear of commitment, Avoidance of projection, Ambivalence between desire and fear, Avoidance when things get serious, Need for freedom. The report distinguishes the areas explored and their limits of interpretation. A separate module explores readiness to change; it is not another trait of the model presented.
How long does this test take?
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The test contains 63 questions and takes approximately 10 min to complete. You can answer at your own pace — your progress is automatically saved in your browser.
How does this test work?
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The test is anonymous and requires no registration. After completing it, you immediately see a preview of your results. The detailed PDF report, with in-depth analysis, charts and personalized recommendations, is available for $3.60.
Is this test scientifically validated?
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This questionnaire draws on 5 dimensions from recognized psychological frameworks (Your reading of your fear of commitment, Avoidance of projection, Ambivalence between desire and fear…). It's a self-assessment tool for reflection, not a clinical diagnostic instrument: it has not undergone formal psychometric validation (sample, reliability coefficient) and does not replace a professional assessment.
What does the PDF report contain?
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Your report includes an analysis by dimension, explanations and personalised points for reflection and a separate readiness-to-change module. Scores are interpreted according to the purpose and limitations of this questionnaire.
Is my data kept confidential?
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No account creation, no email required — no sign-up needed at all. Your answers are sent to our servers while you take the test. All data is automatically deleted after 30 days — see our Privacy page for full detail.
Who is this test for?
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Read this test’s introduction and dimensions to check whether they match your situation. Answer from the perspective specified in the instructions.
Can I retake the test later?
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Yes, you can retake this test as many times as you wish. Some people take it again after several months to observe how their profile evolves. Each new attempt generates its own report — previous answers are not reused.
What should I do with my results?
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The report organises your answers and offers points for reflection. You can discuss it with a professional; it does not replace their assessment or prescribe treatment.
Can people close to me also take it?
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Yes. Each person gets their own anonymous, unique report, based on THEIR answers. Comparing profiles within a family or couple can be useful — provided each person takes the test honestly and on their own, without influencing one another during the answers.
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Test developed by Psychologie et Sérénité. Does not replace a professional consultation.