Breakup Test: Which Stage of Heartbreak Are You In?

This interactive test addresses grief, separation, rumination, anger, shame, self-esteem, comparison, failure, withdrawal, self-care, screens, pleasure, hope, plans, and readiness to change. What the test asks, for example Grief — Whether you still speak about this relationship in the present tense, as though it were continuing. / Whether you regard this relationship as over, even when you miss it. Separation — Whether you watch for a message from your ex, as though something were still open between you. / Whether you can picture the coming year with precise images, in which your ex doesn't appear. Rumination — Whether, as you fall asleep, the last conversations replay, with what you could have said instead. / Whether, when you decide to occupy your mind with something else, it holds at least for the length of the activity. Anger — Whether, when you think back to the breakup, a sense of outrage rises at the way things went. / Whether, when you hear your ex mentioned, it passes without altering your day. Shame — Whether telling the people around you about the breakup takes a preparation you don't mention to anyone. / Whether you can tell this story to someone without your voice or your breathing changing. Self-esteem — Whether, in the evening, what you say to yourself is something like: there was something in me that wasn't enough. / Whether you can name without effort what you brought to this relationship, and what you'll bring elsewhere. Comparison — Whether, at the thought that your ex might be seeing someone, you immediately start comparing yourself. / Whether you can receive a compliment without looking for what it might be hiding. Failure — Whether, when you take stock, what you say to yourself is something like: I didn't measure up. / Whether you see the end of this relationship as something shared. Withdrawal — Whether you stay at home and leave invitations unanswered. / Whether you can enjoy an evening without the breakup inviting itself in. Self-care — Whether you put off the steps that concern your health or your daily life. / Whether you can wake up in the morning with energy, without the breakup being the first thing that comes to you. Screens — Whether you go and look at what your ex posts, knowing it will bring you nothing. / Whether you can fall asleep without your ex having crossed your mind. Pleasure — Whether the activities you used to enjoy have been left aside. / Whether you're finding again wants that are your own, unconnected to what you used to do together. Hope — Whether, when you try to imagine the coming months, no image forms, or only dark ones. / Whether you sometimes catch yourself laughing or looking forward to something, without it feeling out of place. Plans — Whether, from one week to the next, you have the sense of living the same days over again. / Whether you've set yourself a precise project for the coming months. Readiness to change — Whether what you've just described weighs on your life right now. / Whether you want to move forward through this, and believe you're capable of it.