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Am I a Good Intimate Partner? — Couple Test
63 questions·10 min·5 dimensions and a separate readiness-to-change module·up to 14 clinical frameworks·5 report sections
Reviewed by Gildas Garrec, CBT practitioner
Good morning,
This test looks at the place you hold in the intimacy of a couple. It examines four aspects: what is perceived of the other's desires, the sense that the exchange goes both ways, what manages to be said about it, and the attention paid to pleasure being shared. The report describes each of these aspects.
What you receive — a report written from your answers: what stands out, what sustains it, and where to start. This week, this month, later on.
How it is built — each axis is analyzed on its own, then cross-read with the others, through clinical reading frameworks. Your detailed answers are attached as an appendix. See an example report
The test runs over 63 questions and takes about 10 min, for a price of $3.60.
We'd also suggest reading the book The Practical CBT Guide, to take this reflection further. It's included in the price and downloadable.
If you have a question about your report, write to us at contact@psychologieetserenite.com: a psychotherapist will reply within 48 hours.
I'd also suggest analysing your conversation with ScanMyLove; it's a complementary tool that, from your exchanges as partners, sheds light on your relationship dynamics.
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Am I a Good Intimate Partner? — Couple Test — a 63-question self-assessment, about 10 min. This test looks at the place you hold in the intimacy of a couple: hearing the other's desires, reciprocity, what gets said, and shared pleasure. Once finished, you receive a detailed PDF report ($3.60): an interpretation of its 5 dimensions, a radar chart, up to 14 clinical reading frameworks and a personalized action plan. It is designed to help you know yourself better.
This test covers listening, desire, pleasure, empathy, attention, boundaries, speaking your mind, dialogue, avoidance, loneliness, the relationship, sexuality, responsibility and readiness to change. What the test asks, for example Listening If you guess what the other wants, without asking them. If you notice the signs they send without saying them. Desire If you follow your own momentum without checking where the other is. If you can voice a desire without fearing it weighs on the other. Pleasure If the other's pleasure seems less obvious to you than your own. If their pleasure does you good. Empathy If, during sex, you get lost in your own sensations to the point of forgetting the other. If you create the conditions for them to feel good. Attention If you focus on what you feel, without checking what the other is living. If you see the moment the other checks out. Boundaries If you can set a limit without tension rising. If, when a limit is set, you take it into account. Speaking your mind If you keep to yourself what you would like, or what bothers you. If you can manage to say what you like, and what you do not. Dialogue If talking about it between you makes you uncomfortable. If the other and you can talk about it openly. Avoidance If you would rather avoid the subject than face a fight. If you have a time, a place, where delicate subjects can come out. Loneliness If, in the middle of sex, you feel distant from the other, even though there are two of you. If, in bed, you feel the other is present in body but absent in mind. The relationship If, after sex, one of you is left unsatisfied. If this intimacy belongs to both of you, rather than mostly to one. Sexuality If you go through the same sequence rather than following what is happening that night. If the two of you are still searching, together, rather than repeating. Responsibility If you question what you yourself bring to those moments. If you take the initiative so that it stays enjoyable. Readiness to change If what you have just described weighs on your life as a couple. If you want to change the way you function, and believe you are capable of it.
About this test
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Dimensions assessed
- ●Your reading of your place in the couple's intimacy- The way you explain your way of being in your couple's intimacy — listening, exchange, communication, before the test tells you anything. This section does not measure any difficulty and does not produce a level: it collects a starting reading. None of the proposed answers is more correct than another, and the number associated with this section has no particular meaning. Your answer is picked up and commented on in the section of the report dedicated to you.
- ●Listening to the other's desires- To what extent I perceive, listen to and take into account my partner's intimate desires and needs.
- ●Reciprocity- The sense that intimacy between us is a space of genuine exchange, not merely of giving or receiving.
- ●Intimate communication- My capacity to express my own desires, to hear those of the other, and to talk about the intimacy between us.
- ●Attention to shared pleasure- The attention I pay to ensuring our intimacy is satisfying for both of us, not just for me.
- ●Readiness to Change- Measures your current readiness to acknowledge what you're experiencing and allow your situation to evolve.
Reference frameworks and authors
- based on Byers, E. S. (2005). Relationship satisfaction and sexual satisfaction: A longitudinal study of individuals in long-term relationships. Journal of Sex Research, 42(2), 113–118.
Questioning your place as an intimate partner takes an honesty that deserves recognition. These questions don't mean you aren't a good partner — they mean you care about it, which is already a form of presence to the other.
Why take this test?
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This test looks at the place you hold in the intimacy of a couple. It examines four aspects: what is perceived of the other's desires, the sense that the exchange goes both ways, what manages to be said about it, and the attention paid to pleasure being shared. The report describes each of these aspects.
The questionnaire explores 5 areas: Your reading of your place in the couple's intimacy, Listening to the other's desires, Reciprocity, Intimate communication, Attention to shared pleasure. Your answers support reflection, not a diagnosis. A separate module explores readiness to change; it is not another trait of the model presented.
Dimensions explored
These are the aspects explored by this questionnaire. Your answers help put them into perspective.
Your reading of your place in the couple's intimacy
The way you explain your way of being in your couple's intimacy — listening, exchange, communication, before the test tells you anything. This section does not measure any difficulty and does not produce a level: it collects a starting reading. None of the proposed answers is more correct than another, and the number associated with this section has no particular meaning. Your answer is picked up and commented on in the section of the report dedicated to you.
Listening to the other's desires
To what extent I perceive, listen to and take into account my partner's intimate desires and needs.
Reciprocity
The sense that intimacy between us is a space of genuine exchange, not merely of giving or receiving.
Intimate communication
My capacity to express my own desires, to hear those of the other, and to talk about the intimacy between us.
Attention to shared pleasure
The attention I pay to ensuring our intimacy is satisfying for both of us, not just for me.
Readiness to Change
Measures your current readiness to acknowledge what you're experiencing and allow your situation to evolve.
How does it work?
1
Take the test
Answer the 63 questions honestly. There are no right or wrong answers — just choose the option that best describes you. The test takes about 10 min.
2
Proceed to payment
Once you finish the test, pay $3.60 securely to unlock your full report. No registration required.
3
Download your detailed PDF report
For a comprehensive analysis, get your PDF report (5 dimensions analyzed, radar chart, personalized recommendations, action plan). Instant download after secure payment.
Frequently Asked Questions
What does this test measure?
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This test evaluates 5 psychological dimensions: Your reading of your place in the couple's intimacy, Listening to the other's desires, Reciprocity, Intimate communication, Attention to shared pleasure. The report distinguishes the areas explored and their limits of interpretation. A separate module explores readiness to change; it is not another trait of the model presented.
How long does this test take?
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The test contains 63 questions and takes approximately 10 min to complete. You can answer at your own pace — your progress is automatically saved in your browser.
How does this test work?
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The test is anonymous and requires no registration. After completing it, you immediately see a preview of your results. The detailed PDF report, with in-depth analysis, charts and personalized recommendations, is available for $3.60.
Is this test scientifically validated?
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This questionnaire draws on 5 dimensions from recognized psychological frameworks (Your reading of your place in the couple's intimacy, Listening to the other's desires, Reciprocity…). It's a self-assessment tool for reflection, not a clinical diagnostic instrument: it has not undergone formal psychometric validation (sample, reliability coefficient) and does not replace a professional assessment.
What does the PDF report contain?
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Your report includes an analysis by dimension, explanations and personalised points for reflection and a separate readiness-to-change module. Scores are interpreted according to the purpose and limitations of this questionnaire.
Is my data kept confidential?
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No account creation, no email required — no sign-up needed at all. Your answers are sent to our servers while you take the test. All data is automatically deleted after 30 days — see our Privacy page for full detail.
Who is this test for?
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Read this test’s introduction and dimensions to check whether they match your situation. Answer from the perspective specified in the instructions.
Can I retake the test later?
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Yes, you can retake this test as many times as you wish. Some people take it again after several months to observe how their profile evolves. Each new attempt generates its own report — previous answers are not reused.
What should I do with my results?
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The report organises your answers and offers points for reflection. You can discuss it with a professional; it does not replace their assessment or prescribe treatment.
Can people close to me also take it?
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Yes. Each person gets their own anonymous, unique report, based on THEIR answers. Comparing profiles within a family or couple can be useful — provided each person takes the test honestly and on their own, without influencing one another during the answers.
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Test developed by Psychologie et Sérénité. Does not replace a professional consultation.