Low Desire: Understanding My Libido

This test covers desire, arousal, sexuality, fantasies, affection, the relationship, conflict, tiredness, the body, anticipation, shame, avoidance, dialogue, speaking your mind and readiness to change. What the test asks, for example Desire If you rarely have sexual or erotic thoughts or urges. If you sometimes feel desire once you have started, rarely before. Arousal If your body still responds physically, but your mind stays elsewhere. If you cannot seem to get in the mood even when you try. Sexuality If you feel your sexuality has become a source of pressure rather than pleasure. If you hold your sexuality to norms you consistently fall short of. Fantasies If erotic fantasies have become rare and hard to summon spontaneously. If you rarely think about sex outside of moments when your partner initiates it. Affection If tenderness, cuddling and playfulness have also decreased between you. If spontaneous sensual moments have disappeared from your daily life. The relationship If routine in your relationship has gradually extinguished desire. If the lack of emotional connection with your partner reduces your desire. Conflict If unresolved conflicts with your partner systematically cut off your desire. If you go along with things that make you uncomfortable, to avoid conflict or disappointment. Tiredness If fatigue or lack of sleep is an obstacle to your desire. If work stress or daily worries invade your intimate space. The body If your relationship with your body, how you see it and how you accept it, plays a role in your desire. If feeling insufficiently attractive or desirable holds you back from wanting to be intimate. Anticipation If you are afraid of not performing well, and this fear affects your desire. If feeling you will not meet your partner's expectations holds your desire back. Shame If shame or embarrassment prevents you from addressing this topic openly. If patterns of shame, guilt and false expectations activate during intimate moments. Avoidance If you actively avoid situations that might lead to sex. If you are less receptive to your partner's approaches than before. Dialogue If what happens in your sex life stays, almost always, a topic you avoid. If you can talk about your intimate life openly and without tension. Speaking your mind If you find it hard to express what you need or what gives you pleasure in intimacy. If you go along rather than say no, even without feeling like it. Readiness to change If what you just described has a real impact on your life. If you want to evolve the way you function.