Jealousy Test: Jealousy and Possessiveness

This test assumes you are currently in a relationship, or that you are answering with a specific relationship in mind: most questions are about an ongoing partnership. This interactive test covers jealousy, the couple, control, screens, comparison, attachment, rejection, trust, anger, rumination, conflict, anxiety, self-esteem and readiness to change. What the test asks, for example Jealousy If, when a suspicion suddenly overwhelms you, you raise your voice before you have even thought. If, even when a suspicion floods you in the middle of an evening out, you stay in control of your words and gestures. The couple If, when your partner goes away on a trip, what comes to mind is something like: this trip is a way to see someone else. If, when your partner gets home later than planned, you wait for their explanation without imagining the worst. Control If, when your partner is in the shower, you take the opportunity to reread their conversations on their phone. If, when your partner leaves their messages open, you look away and move on. Screens If you check your partner's last-seen time on a messaging app, to find out whether your message has been read. If you leave your partner their own space on social media, without looking at who they follow. Comparison If, in front of the mirror, you compare yourself to the people your partner might find attractive. If you look at a photo of your partner's former love without comparing yourself to that person. Attachment If, from the very start of a relationship, what comes to mind is something like: I'm going to be left. If, when your partner tells you they love you, what comes to mind is something like: it's true, I deserve it. Rejection If, when your partner ignores your photo and reacts to other people's, you feel rejection. If, at a party where your partner meets up with their friends, you stay in the conversation without monitoring their comings and goings. Trust If, when moving in together comes up, what comes to mind is something like: their commitment to this relationship isn't sincere. If a friend's success or the charm of someone you pass leaves the confidence you have in your relationship intact. Anger If, when a doubt about your partner crosses your mind, anger rises before you have checked anything at all. If, when a suspicion rises in you, you step outside for some air before saying anything. Rumination If, before falling asleep, you run through infidelity scenarios one after another, without managing to stop. If, when your partner goes out without you, you let their evening be theirs, without trying to know everything. Conflict If an argument linked to a jealous suspicion keeps smouldering long after it has broken out. If you tell your partner what you feel in a calm voice, without blame or accusations. Anxiety If, when your partner takes a while to reply to a message, your stomach stays knotted until the answer arrives. If you feel secure in your relationship, without needing repeated reassurance to believe in it. Self-esteem If, when your partner openly admires a friend's success, what comes to mind is something like: I'm no match. If you are certain you bring your partner things that no one else gives them. Readiness to change If what you have just described weighs on your relationships. If you want to change the way you function day to day.